There isn’t one right way to co-parent as a single parent.

Some parents communicate daily and share school events. Others keep contact to a minimum. Some are parenting entirely on their own with no involvement from the other parent at all.

It’s easy to compare yourself to other families and wonder whether you’re doing things “the right way”, but in reality, the best co-parenting setup is the one that works for your situation and keeps life as stable as possible for your children.

Here are three different co-parenting arrangements and the practical strategies that help make them work.

Emma – Cooperative Co-Parenting

Emma and her ex separated four years ago and now share care of their two children almost equally. The children move between homes during the week, and both parents attend school events and activities.

Emma says the biggest challenge early on was learning how to communicate without falling back into old arguments.

Now, they keep things simple and practical.

They use:

• A shared online calendar for school events and clubs
• A WhatsApp chat just for child-related messages
• A regular routine so the children know what to expect

Emma says that consistency has made the biggest difference.

“We don’t always agree, but we try to keep things predictable. The kids know where they’ll be and when, and that helps everyone.”

One thing that works well for Emma is keeping communication focused on the children, rather than discussing past relationship issues.

Even with cooperative co-parenting, Emma says it’s still emotionally complicated at times.

“People assume it’s easy if you get on, but it’s still a lot of coordination and compromise.”

Mark – Parallel Parenting

Mark’s situation looks very different.

Communication between him and his ex is limited and structured. They follow a fixed schedule and make most arrangements in writing to avoid misunderstandings.

This approach is often called parallel parenting, where parents remain involved but keep their lives largely separate.

For Mark, structure is essential.

He relies on:

• A written parenting schedule
• Email communication instead of phone calls
• Clear handover times and locations
• Keeping conversations brief and factual

“I realised we were arguing about everything. Once we moved to email and stuck to the schedule, things became much calmer.”

Mark has found that reducing contact has actually helped him focus more on parenting.

“It’s not friendly, but it’s stable. That’s what matters.”

Parallel parenting can feel less warm from the outside, but for many families it provides the consistency children need.

Leanne – Parenting Alone

Leanne has been raising her son on her own since he was two. His other parent is not involved, and day-to-day decisions are entirely hers.

Without another parent to share responsibilities, planning ahead is essential.

Leanne has built a small but reliable support network that includes:

• Her sister, who can help in emergencies
• A trusted neighbour
• Another parent from school
• A backup babysitter

“I don’t have a co-parent, so I’ve had to create my own backup plan.”

She keeps routines simple and predictable, which helps both her and her son.

“If something goes wrong, at least I know what a normal week looks like.”

One thing Leanne found surprisingly helpful was connecting with other single parents.

“Talking to people who understand makes a huge difference. You don’t have to explain everything.”

There Isn’t One “Right” Way

Looking at these three families, it’s clear how different single-parent setups can be.

Some parents share responsibilities closely. Some keep contact minimal. Some parent entirely alone.

Each approach comes with its own challenges:

• Cooperative parenting requires communication and compromise
• Parallel parenting relies on structure and boundaries
• Solo parenting requires planning and support networks

None of these is better than the others – they simply reflect different circumstances.

Finding What Works for You

Co-parenting arrangements often evolve over time.

What works in the first year after separation may not be what works later on. Children grow older, schedules change, and relationships shift.

The most helpful starting point is usually asking:

• What makes daily life calmer?
• What reduces conflict?
• What helps the children feel secure?
• What feels manageable for you?

Those answers often point towards the setup that fits best.

Support Makes a Difference

Whatever your co-parenting arrangement looks like, it can help to talk to other single parents who understand the practical realities.

Whether you’re coordinating handovers, setting boundaries, or parenting on your own, it’s reassuring to hear how other families make it work.

Every single-parent family looks a little different, and sometimes just knowing that can make things feel a bit easier.

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